Swimming Lessons

Ricardo started swimming lessons this week with Monica.  He was so exicted when I told him the night before but tears came the next morning when it looked, to him, that we weren't going.  His experience of a pool is that we all put our bathing suits on, grab a towel and walk to the hotel pool.  Instead I was putting his suit and towel in a bag and Ali was collecting her stuff for school.  I tried to explain but the tears continued until we had dropped Ali off and were half way to the pool and I keep repeating that he was going swimming now.  He was nervous when we got to the pool, which must have looked strange to him as it was in a building and there were no palm trees.  And because I work for the local Parks and Rec Departmen everyone knew who he was when we entered the building.  They were all excited to see him. 

Once he saw Monica on the deck, his nervousness began to fade.  And there was no problem in the pool.  He was smiling the whole time. 

Today, he was excited that we were going to the pool again and there were no tears.  He knew that we would go once we dropped Ali at school.  This time, as we were driving, he kept saying, "the pool's not here."  And I would respond that it was still 5 minutes away.  This conversation continued until we reached the pool. 

He made great strides today putting his head in the water and even swimming on his own for about 15 seconds.  Again, he was smiling the whole time. 

Happy Birthday Ali

Yesterday Ali turned 8 years old!  We celebrated her birthday on Saturday.  We (or maybe I should say "I") decided against having a big party.  I didn't think I could handle the stress of organizing a party and that a house full of screaming girls might be a bit much for Ricardo.  So instead she invited her frient Hannah over for two days.  We started out with some free playtime followed by lunch and cake.  We then headed to Nanaimo to see Puss in Boots, 3D.  Ricardo had never been to the movies before and he was really excited.  The movie even had some Spanish words in it.  Ricardo is still talking about the movie.

After the movie we had dinner at a local restaurant followed by 5 pin cosmic bowling.  I haven't been bowling in years.  My first time up I got a strike but I quickly went down hill from there.  Hannah won!  Ricardo had never been bowling and both girls coached him.  He had some pretty good shots. 

Hannah stayed the night and the girls (and myself) did not get much sleep.  Sunday was spent playing in the morning and then we headed to the park and the beach in the afternoon. 

Ali enjoyed her birthday and was not upset at not having a big party.  It was much easier on me, no stress.   I think we will do something similar for her birthday next year. 

Monica

The first week home, I introduced Ricardo to Monica.  Monica is from Mexico and, of course, she can speak Spanish.  She chatted with him about Canada and what he was feeling.  One thing that was confirmed is that he doesn't want to speak English.  I think because it is all he has left from his other life.  Everything was taken from him and all that is left is Spanish.  He told us that he misses home especially the other foster kids.  This also explains the crying spells.  They have been short but they come out of no where.  All of a sudden he cries. They happen when I turn my back for a second so I am not sure if something happened. I thought it was home sickness but I had Monica confirm that it wasn't something else.  Did he hurt himself or did I do something to upset him? Monica confirmed that he wasn't hurt. He said that he doesn't know why he cries. When she said that I knew it is because he misses Honduras. He has to grieve for what he has lost. I am sure all of a sudden he thinks of something and the tears come. She also confirmed with him that he knew that he was in Canada to stay and that this was his family forever. He knew this but of course he misses his other family. Monica asked him what he liked best about Canada and he said "the toys".  She asked him what he thought of the cold weather and he said "No problem, you just put a coat on". 

I am glad to have Monica and her family.  Ricardo gets really happy when ever I mention Monica's name.  I am sure she provides comfort because she speaks Spanish.  This week Ricardo started swimming lessons with Monica (she is a swim instructor at our local pool).  He loves the pool and he will get to spend time with Monica. 

First Week Home

Its just over a week that we have been home and things are going well.  We are settling into a routine and recovering from the stress of the last few weeks.  We haven't done much but stay at home.  I am really amazed at how well Ricardo is doing.  He has dealt with tremendous change over the last few months but he still has a big smile on his face most of the time. 

Ricardo's experience of life in the foster home was pretty limited.   Most of Ricardo's life was spent in the living room watching tv.  He had never been to a park or grocery store or even played outside on the street.  His companions were the other foster kids who were 3 and 4.  His only glimse of the outside world was when the foster mother walked him to school.  She treated him like he was young in fact he was still sleeping in a crib at the foster mothers.  And he is almost seven. 

In the first few days with him, I could see that he had never experienced much outside the home.  I had to watch him all the time and explain many things to him.  But what amazes me is that he has greated most new situations and new places with great enthusiasm.  He loved getting to new hotel rooms, going out in the taxi or going shopping.  He also liked the flights as well. 

One of the few things that he hasn't been keen on is meeting other children.  He is naturally shy so backs away from groups of kids.   I think he also feels intimitated by other children his same age as they have so much experience and therefore they seem more confident.  I know that school is going to be an issue.  When we took Ali back last week we walked through the school yard and I explained to Ricardo that he was soon going to go to school too.  He said, "No, I don't want to go". 

He is getting on really well with Ali.  She is also very happy because now she has a living person to play with instead of a doll.  Once she taught school to the dog and a doll.  Now she has Ricardo and Ricardo, being easy going, does what ever she says.  She directs him to write out letters, then to pack up his books because school is over and she marches him back to his room.  She even had him doing yoga yesterday.  And he is totally happy playing along in whatever roll is assigned. 

He is not talking much English at this point.  He still using the words "swimming" and "bubbles" and has added "all done" and "Sit down Daisy" for the dog.  And is favourite words are "mini golf" which is uses everytime we pass the place with the pirate ship and the giant shoe.  I have been trying to get him to speak more English but I was getting the feeling that he doesn't want to speak English.  One day he told me that his family speaks Spanish so he doesn't want to speak English.  I tried to explain that his foster family spoke Spanish but that his new family speaks English and he will have to learn English too.  I wil see how he progresses in the next week.

So this week we will stay home again and rest up as I am still tired.  Last week I was totally exhausted but I am feeling a little better this week.  I am going to start getting Ricardo out more next week.  I need to build up his confidence in dealing with the outside world.  Sitting here at home is similar to what happened in Honduras and I know that he needs to take some steps forward because he is going to have to go to school at some point.  I am going to look into some activities for him that we can start next week.

Halloween and the first day home

I was hoping for a quiet day today but it ended up being a busy day.  It was quiet for the first two hours but then we had to head out.  First, I needed clothes for Ricardo.  He was down to one pair of jeans and one pair of socks.  So he was in is glory getting new clothes and pjs and slippers.  When we were trying clothes on he said that everything fit perfectly even if it didn't.  I guess he wanted everything no matter what. 
Second, I needed Halloween stuff.  Make up for Ali, candy etc.  We had to go to a few stores to get Vampire teeth since some stores had sold out.  Ali already had a cape and Ricardo had a costume that Ali wore a few years back.  He put it on as soon as he got up. 

And then Third, I wanted to get the final papers done for the Canadian Citizenship Certificate.  This involved a short form and a letter to explain that the Embassy in Guatemala had taken the photos from me and that I wanted all my documents back.  Of course my printer died so I also had to go somewhere to get documents photocopied and the letter printed off before heading to the post office.

Then it was time to go home to carve the pumpkin.  Ricardo was not sure what we were doing but he soon caught on and helped to clean out the insides.  Ali carved one pumpkin and Ricardo and I did the other.  Then it was time to get ready.  Ali did her own make-up and then wanted to do Ricardo's. 

Ricardo with the pumpkins



Ali the make-up artist




All set to go out trick or treating



We headed out the door at 6:30.  Ricardo must think he has landed in a fantasy land.  You wear costumes all day and then go out at night and get candy.  He wasn't frightened by anything and was really fasinated by the flash light.  And once he got the first candy, he was running from door to door.  We headed towards the local park where there was a pumpkin walk through the park.  Hundreds of  pumpkins are set along a trail in the woods.  The kids liked it but were getting tired so we headed home. 



Pumpkins in the woods


Hopefully, things will be calm now for the next few weeks.  Ricardo has just been so wound up with everything and then we had Halloween on top of it all.  Ali is going back to school and I will have the first time alone with Ricardo.  We need to establish some routines and some guidelines.  This is my focus for the next few weeks. 

Home

Finally, we are home!!  Three days of travelling, 4 flights, two hotels and hours in airports.  Our first flight to Costa Rica was only 1 hours and 15 minutes but we spent a total of 6.5 hours between hotels either in lines at airports or waiting for the hotel bus.  Our flight from Costa Rica to Toronto was two and a half hours late which means we didn't get to the hotel until after midnight and then we had to get up at five.  However, the kids didn't seem tired at all.  Especially Ricardo.  I think he was so excited to finally be in Canada that it over took any feelings of being tired.  I was glad to get home and I was welcomed by flowers and balloons from my friends Sandra and John!



Ricardo and Ali did great through all the travelling.  I am sure that Ricardo was starting to think that we live in airports and hotels.  When we finally got home, he was so excited and ran around the house pulling out all of Ali's toys.  I only had a few toys for him in his room as I didn't want to over whelm him but I forgot about Ali's toys.  Actually, I had imagined that things would be calmer but it was crazy.  He was running wild and Ali was leading him along from place to place.  I was still coming up the stairs when he found his room.  Within half an hour, he had a costume on and it stayed on for the rest of the day.  The house looks like a bomb hit it.

One thing that I was worried about was the dog.  The foster mother told me that Ricardo was frightened by dogs.  And my dog will bark at strangers who are in our house.  But there was no problem.  The dogs never barked and Ricardo liked the dog.  In fact, he is very interested in her.  He keeps pointing at her and watching everything she does.  He thought it was very funny when she went and slept in her dog bed.  There were no pets in the foster home so it must seem odd to him to have a dog in the home. 

I am exhausted.  It is going to take me days to get organized.  And weeks to get over the stress of the trip.  I think a big crash is coming for all of us. 





Day 37

Today we visited the town of Antigua, about 40 minutes outside of Guatemala City.  It is a beautiful town surrounded by volcanos.  The town is colourful and behind some of the doors are beautiful courtyards.  There are also many ruins in the town from a earthquake in 1773.  The town was established by the Spanish in the mid-1550s and it was the capital of the central america area.  But there were several major earthquakes and in the 1700s the capital was moved to Guatemala City.  The site is now a world hertiage site. 

One of the many ruins in the town

Church near central park

The Central Park

A court yard

The arch of Santa Catalina built in 1663

A view of the buildings

View through the arch

Another view through the arch

A beautiful Church

All the windows in the town had these grates around them and were often full of flowers

A side street

Tomorrow we start our long journey home.  I can't believe that this adoption is final complete after 3 long years.